yesterday i watched American Race and the National Geographic Documentary Hell on Earth - The Fall of Syria & the Rise of Isis ...like one after the other. Intense doesn't even describe it. It made me sad, mad, protective. and my heart breaks for these families who have had to endure all of this civil warfare. The kids...I can't.. as a mom, you are torn inside and out when you see other mom's grieve.
I can't say I am always up to date on whats going on in the world, I am not always perceptive to whats happening in our country, but these were both eye opening shows that made me realize how backwards our human race had become. I got bashed for my opinion on that travel ban and the limit of refugees coming in, but after watching this, we wouldn't be able to sustain that big of an influx of people coming in, we can barely handle those crossing the borders with the resources we have. extremists are here in our own country, why invite more people from over seas masking as an innocent victim. Obama should have taken out that regime when he had the chance... seriously, I am angry. I am also angry that we have a current president who thinks that sending the media on a hamster wheel of stories about Russian collusion is going to take away the fact that he has no idea what he's doing and his policies just divide the ENTIRE world.
I am now admittedly, ignorant to the black lives matter movement, I am stunned how 'economic racism' is still in this country. what a shame. shame on these states who allow it to happen. noone should ever be 'red lined' in their life. its sad. I feel horrible for not choosing to educate myself on this earlier and then having an opinion on the race concerns.
So that is part of the problem, my ignorance to what was outside my safe bubble. I obviously am not the only one, otherwise these issues in our world wouldn't be headlines right now. we all walk around with these blinders on or the notion of 'it will take care of it self' No.
i am proud of these courageous people that advocate for what's right, who go through ups and downs for the greater good of the human race. I like the sound of their squeeky wheels now.
6/4/17
On Purpose: Living and Loving
When I think about the past 6 months, I think "shit, what have i done?!" Seriously, what is it have i done? why am i so busy but yet can sit here and write a blog post, haha.
I created a digital magazine with a simple message of connecting you to the professionals. it seems obvious, but to me it wasn't- i wanted to break the mold of seeing the same old same old, i wanted to highlight everyone i could that was trying to make a name for themselves in the industry. Now, I know Wed Utah isn't the biggest platform out there, but to be featured on something with actual viewers is a big deal to anyone. it means your work is being validated, it's something to give these guys confidence to help catapult them into meaningful business.
My first issue was highlighting a culture i've never even been a part of, then on the second issue, I put a plus size model on the cover, I did a shoot in a boxing ring. I told my models to be serious, feel empowered and be proud. i put lifestyle bloggers in the issue with their recipes- whoa! i got a lot of head shaking with that one. "but you're a wedding magazine" I know..and it's MY magazine, I can do what I want..,hmmm..oh, I also wrote my first e-guide, a how to plan your own wedding guide. yep. it can be purchased even...meep!
What else have I done? Oh yeah, took on weddings when I said I wasn't going to. But I am grateful for them, because they were all referrals- I didn't have to do any promotions, campaigns, pitching or anything...they just came to me. And its actually a little more stressful cause there are two parties to impress here, the bride and groom, and the person who referred them.
Luckily I have a legit team this year. I can't even believe it. I can't even believe they want to work with me...cause I am beastly most of the time haha. but I am really really thankful for the ladies, we are getting photos taken this month and i know its just photos, but it represents more to me than that.
I planned a launch party for the magazine in like 5 weeks. haha. it was nuts. but i wouldn't have been able to pull it off without all these people and so much more. they busted their asses without hardly knowing what it was I was trying to do myself. At the end of the night, when the party was done, my heart was full and i cried on the way home. I cried cause i couldn't comprehend why all these people came when they didn't even know me, I didn't understand that someone would come support something that hadn't been around yet. but here they were.
Okay, so this isn't about all business...the past 6 months, what have I done?
I have put myself in a spotlight now that encourages people to be judgmental and mean. Someone told me " i just don't find you amazing" okay..
amazing. hmmm. i didn't know i was doing this to somehow convince you I was amazing. and if that is what it seems like i am doing, than I am missing the mark here. I am doing this to let other people know they are amazing. I am doing a magazine to tell other vendors no matter how long they have been around, they can have a publication to look to for support and tell them they are amazing. i do it for the brides and grooms so that they feel amazing on their big day, I do it so people who are looking to build a brand can look at someone and say, ' well if she can do that , i definitely can'
also, im sorry if me posting about my family offends you, i think my husband and my kids are the greatest, and i post. thats who what i do. and in all honesty, instagram has become my 'blog' now cause all the photos that would have gone into my blog are there with shorter captions and stories.
Also, i am learning now that with a business, i feel like my kids are growing up so much faster! haha...like the months are flying by with Charlotte, I took a full year off of anything wedding related and i feel like i just paid more attention to her growth. with Arthur im like flying by the seat of my pants getting him fed and diapers changed
we put her in a pre-3 school and she has just grown so much, like, you know your kids are smart, but then these teachers have a way to bringing it to the surface. she talks more, she is confident in her ability to process and repeat. its amazing. i love her to pieces.also i reposted this blog article about missing my time with my first born. its been hard for me to balance my time with both kids, and i just feel like im losing that one on one time i was spoiled with when it was just me a chuck. Do any of you moms feel that way. i really got emotional about it, but im emotional about everything anymore. when i see babies i get emotional, when i see those subaru commercials where the kids are grown up and moving to college, i get emotional. I know this would be a cue for some to tell me to have another baby..but i am done. and maybe thats why i am sad, cause i am done. and so my time with two kiddos is cherished everyday. living and loving on purpose, everyday, not with purpose, but on purpose, cause other people depend on me...and i depend on them.
now to start planning arthur's first birthday..yeah..ONE!!
1/24/17
The Movement I Make for Women
It's been a while since I have 'blogged' I don't know, its probably cause I post my stuff on insta and facebook and its easier to pop out a photo and a caption than to sit and really type. But I really don't have a ton of time on my hands, Art is down for a nap, Charlotte is watching Ryans Toy Review and slowly slurping her organic cereal with inorganic milk until she decides she wants me to be Toby and play trains with her.
I wanted to take a few minutes to really weigh in on this whole Women's Rights thing, and how it has turned from Pro Choice to an anti Trump rally joke.
I'm seeing all these ladies stomping around with pink hats on shaped like cat ears, something I'd buy my two year old...but if you know Charlotte, she wouldn't even wear that,
that shouldn't be your symbol of woman's rights. a fucking pink hat with cat ears...really?
I'm seeing posters with a female uterus blown up on it marching down along the road to the capital and people are waving and cheering like no one has ever seen one before...really? a uterus? that's your symbol of women's rights?
All of a sudden there are words like 'pussy' flying around like its supposed to hurt somebody..again, saying pussy is going to be your word of the day to fight for women's rights?
I get it. I get that women have historically been treated like the lesser of two beings when standing next to a man. I get that we are considered bitches when we try to compete on that corporate ladder, but men are considered motivated. I think some of you don't realize i worked with males all my life before Muyly Miller Company. my last job was the worst, I worked with a guy who had little mans disease cause he can't find a girl to love him cause he lets his ego get in the way of just being a good guy. I worked with a sales guy who forged signatures so he could get ahead on his commissions, I worked with a guy who would hate office members every other week, so dramatic right? I mean, you put all the dicks in one room and they are literally thinking about measuring how large their penises are while bashing the other office members that they can't communicate correctly with them. I am not even joking.
My old boss was considered a woman hater, unbeknownst to him, and people always wondered why I worked for him.
Let me tell you why I enjoyed working for him. It's cause I made it a point to let him know, by my actions and my completed tasks that I could handle whatever he dished out, without complaining and whining and whipping my i am woman hear more roar sign out like "look at me, i don't need those menial tasks cause I am above that"
What I am saying is, all the women out there, i get you want to march in solidarity..but now that day is done. now what? go back to work, toot your horn that you were on TV with a pink hat on carrying a poster that had some writing on it? Now what? are you going to pout the whole week at work and wonder why you are doing the job you are doing while the men are moving on with their lives?
Your anti trump movement gave him a platform to artificially support the rights of women, you gave him a bigger voice now cause you know what..you enabled it. you have enabled him to be on the news even more, you have enabled him to be on our social media feeds, even more, you have made it so that CNN and FOX, NPR and NBC , can all use you and exploit you as a source of news to talk about trump.
while you are at work, just do your work, and complete above and beyond all the tasks you need to do to get ahead, or to get that award. work your ass off to land that lead, work your ass off to make sure you are home in time to play with your kids and show your kids that not only can you work, work hard, but you can balance that with your family life and love on those kids like none other.
On the weekends, do a service project and show your kids that not only do you work, and love them , but you love others. you love others enough to donate your time to help a stranger, or donate items to charity.
You show all of us that you are more than just a media hungry feminist boasting about women's rights when really all you want to do is make it in life and be seen as an equal. I promise you- I never had problems with my boss cause i worked hard to show him i was just as capable. and now I'm running my own magazine and he's shaking his head in disbelief that i paid that much attention.
You control you, you control how people treat you, respect you, view you. you do it only by you. you aren't working any harder or any lesser than men, we all have different ways and views on what success is. Work to fulfill your pride and your families needs. I've met so many women C level leaders that had it way more worse than some of us and manage to make way more than their male counterparts.
I am not telling you to get off your platform, but sometimes you need to think about your actions in how you move forward..that's how it helps everyone move forward. lead by example, and then empower the next woman, and the next and the next...quit being a catty whiny victimized employee (you know you are if you complain more than you work) and just do your work to move ahead where you want to be in life. We live in the United States of America. We have so much more freedoms than some and you should take advantage of what you have and be grateful for where you live. Let time run its course with this new potus, and respect the country you live in.
that is all. back to mommyhood and a crying baby.
I wanted to take a few minutes to really weigh in on this whole Women's Rights thing, and how it has turned from Pro Choice to an anti Trump rally joke.
I'm seeing all these ladies stomping around with pink hats on shaped like cat ears, something I'd buy my two year old...but if you know Charlotte, she wouldn't even wear that,
that shouldn't be your symbol of woman's rights. a fucking pink hat with cat ears...really?
I'm seeing posters with a female uterus blown up on it marching down along the road to the capital and people are waving and cheering like no one has ever seen one before...really? a uterus? that's your symbol of women's rights?
All of a sudden there are words like 'pussy' flying around like its supposed to hurt somebody..again, saying pussy is going to be your word of the day to fight for women's rights?
I get it. I get that women have historically been treated like the lesser of two beings when standing next to a man. I get that we are considered bitches when we try to compete on that corporate ladder, but men are considered motivated. I think some of you don't realize i worked with males all my life before Muyly Miller Company. my last job was the worst, I worked with a guy who had little mans disease cause he can't find a girl to love him cause he lets his ego get in the way of just being a good guy. I worked with a sales guy who forged signatures so he could get ahead on his commissions, I worked with a guy who would hate office members every other week, so dramatic right? I mean, you put all the dicks in one room and they are literally thinking about measuring how large their penises are while bashing the other office members that they can't communicate correctly with them. I am not even joking.
My old boss was considered a woman hater, unbeknownst to him, and people always wondered why I worked for him.
Let me tell you why I enjoyed working for him. It's cause I made it a point to let him know, by my actions and my completed tasks that I could handle whatever he dished out, without complaining and whining and whipping my i am woman hear more roar sign out like "look at me, i don't need those menial tasks cause I am above that"
What I am saying is, all the women out there, i get you want to march in solidarity..but now that day is done. now what? go back to work, toot your horn that you were on TV with a pink hat on carrying a poster that had some writing on it? Now what? are you going to pout the whole week at work and wonder why you are doing the job you are doing while the men are moving on with their lives?
Your anti trump movement gave him a platform to artificially support the rights of women, you gave him a bigger voice now cause you know what..you enabled it. you have enabled him to be on the news even more, you have enabled him to be on our social media feeds, even more, you have made it so that CNN and FOX, NPR and NBC , can all use you and exploit you as a source of news to talk about trump.
while you are at work, just do your work, and complete above and beyond all the tasks you need to do to get ahead, or to get that award. work your ass off to land that lead, work your ass off to make sure you are home in time to play with your kids and show your kids that not only can you work, work hard, but you can balance that with your family life and love on those kids like none other.
On the weekends, do a service project and show your kids that not only do you work, and love them , but you love others. you love others enough to donate your time to help a stranger, or donate items to charity.
You show all of us that you are more than just a media hungry feminist boasting about women's rights when really all you want to do is make it in life and be seen as an equal. I promise you- I never had problems with my boss cause i worked hard to show him i was just as capable. and now I'm running my own magazine and he's shaking his head in disbelief that i paid that much attention.
You control you, you control how people treat you, respect you, view you. you do it only by you. you aren't working any harder or any lesser than men, we all have different ways and views on what success is. Work to fulfill your pride and your families needs. I've met so many women C level leaders that had it way more worse than some of us and manage to make way more than their male counterparts.
I am not telling you to get off your platform, but sometimes you need to think about your actions in how you move forward..that's how it helps everyone move forward. lead by example, and then empower the next woman, and the next and the next...quit being a catty whiny victimized employee (you know you are if you complain more than you work) and just do your work to move ahead where you want to be in life. We live in the United States of America. We have so much more freedoms than some and you should take advantage of what you have and be grateful for where you live. Let time run its course with this new potus, and respect the country you live in.
that is all. back to mommyhood and a crying baby.
3/7/16
Finding the Solution: Something for us biz people
Hey guys! I normally don't do businessy blog posts on here, but I really wanted to make sure I had it to remember it and to know that it was shared, jic someone needed something to relate to.
I get these gigantic ideas in my head, more often than not, and sometimes I act on them and sometimes I just keep them in the Idea box. But when I act on it, it's like a steam roller process. I am hard to stop once I'm focused. ( Wes can totally tell you, he hates this side of me, haha)
Last Spring I did this thing called the Salt Lake Valley Wedding Workshop. The idea was to bring planning brides together with vendors in a class room type setting. It was meant to be intimate and informative and ultimately help myself and the other vendors gain some business with Brides who we may not have been able to meet with otherwise. I planned this thing in January and held it in April. It was nuts- literally I was selling ad space, selling listings, getting myself on TV, promoting it in social media and blog posts. I don't know how I did it. I 'hired' my friend Cassie to help me with some of the duties, but she did it as a volunteer- which was SO awesome. such a great friend- seriously, she saved my butt!
There were a lot of phases to this event, a lot of layers and arms that could be used as a 'revenue source' and I just went with it, as crazy as it made me in the short amount of time to plan it.
So it turned out great! I couldn't have asked for better vendors, and the location was Red Butte Gardens and Arboretum too- wow, I had a great attendance and great follow up as well. I was even able to get The Knot to sponsor it in the form of swag, and that was awesome. I will keep that secret under my belt, and I am glad I have built upon that relationship with them. And it's my right to keep it a secret, I worked really hard to find the right contact, I worked hard all around on this. So it kinda bugs me when people just ask me for a contact. you have no idea sometimes how much time and effort went into getting that- no one helped me with creating my initial contact lists with this event or just this business in general. In fact, all of this was all me- i found a way and i did it. But anyways, im not here to vent, haha.
For this year, I planned it the beginning of the year instead of Spring. And this year I decided to sell my tickets through groupon. And I decided not to push ad sales in the workbook as hard, I didn't even do a workbook this year. I went with this next one as though I had built enough steam from my last one that 'surely people know about it, it will sell it self'
Long story short- the event flopped. like seriously flopped! I'm sure some people are laughing at me right now cause they love to see a person fail, and I am sure some people are surprised. I think most people are surprised, and that the 1% who really want to see me fail don't even bother to read my posts anyways.
The four vendors that showed up to present were great and were prepared of course, but out of 30 seats, 11 paid tickets (11 and then their plus one) 3 people showed up you guys. 3. one wasn't even getting married, one was an actual bride and her plus one was her mother.
But we made the best of it and sat around 1 table and did a discussion. and then I was out $180 on food and supplies. So I am sorta glad , now, that I didn't spend $800 like I did for the first one. But it goes to show, you need to spend money to make money. I probably shouldn't have been to cocky, and made so many different changes to my approach. But then again, you have to try or you won't know.
And even the day after, I sent a very honest email to all the vendors, even my sponsor, the knot. and I told them why I think it failed, I apologized and made a promise to give them some business either way the best I could. and I got great feedback from all of them. Of course there was disappointment, but when you work with great people , we all just want to see each other succeed and be happy and that was the overall sentiment.
Part of having these events is to create a new base of followers for marketing. And if you have a successful event with many attendees, you are able to build a good list of people to market to. I was obligated to my Sponsor, and if you know anything about sponsorship's, you are to share that list of people as well, which isn't a big deal when it's all wedding related. But because I had only 3 attendees, it was hard to fulfill my promise to The Knot. I just told them I would in a reasonable time frame, and luckily they were very understanding- again cause I had already built that relationship with them. I really didn't have time to continue to analyze why this event didn't work, I just felt like I had to keep moving forward to find a solution and I did.
I wasn't going to let this flopped workshop bring me down. I knew there was a way to engage new brides, help them, and help them help me. I am working on a big tech/media project and I was able to do surveys and get participation from actual Brides, in Utah. and they got a Knot swag bag by participating. It was a win win for all of us cause I needed market research done and I had stuff to give away and people wanted that stuff. I mean.. it was almost too easy.
I want people to understand that planning a public event is not easy, its intimidating, it's not always the same time and time again, and you have that fear of 'what if people don't show up' My first one went well, and my second one didn't. And maybe it was luck or maybe it was meant to be a learning experience from the beginning. I can go crazy with all the 'what if's'- but I didn't and I don't now. I accepted it and made myself find a solution to fulfill the goal of my event which was to connect with local brides (the big picture here is to obviously try to gain business out of them) and make my sponsor happy- And I did it.
If anyone is struggling out there with a situation that 'seemed' to fail on them. don't let it get to you. take a step forward and look at the overall goal and find another solution to that goal . It is never a one way path or an easy one for that matter. Pat yourself for taking the leap to make something happen, don't put yourself down for any reason, and be honest with people that are involved. When you take yourself into a business adventure- whether it's a hobby that pays, or a simple handmade item you want to sell, or something really big like an accounting service or a full time photographer- you are a business person. you have a business. and that business lives inside you because you had an idea backed up by your own confidence. Don't let that original spark leave you as you continue to grow in your journey of entrepreneurship. And don't be afraid to take it and use it on other business ideas or projects. It's that feeling that will , and should, get you through the 'flopped times' the downfalls and stumbles. Persevere!
I hope this helps, and I hope it helps you better understand me as well. When you see me hopping all over on different things, its cause I know, even if I fail at least I tried, and I had the guts to try, because I had an idea backed up by confidence. P.S. if you are wondering- I made no profit on any of the workshops. and will I still try to do them in the future..probably. and if you're asking why, then you didn't get this post.
I get these gigantic ideas in my head, more often than not, and sometimes I act on them and sometimes I just keep them in the Idea box. But when I act on it, it's like a steam roller process. I am hard to stop once I'm focused. ( Wes can totally tell you, he hates this side of me, haha)
Last Spring I did this thing called the Salt Lake Valley Wedding Workshop. The idea was to bring planning brides together with vendors in a class room type setting. It was meant to be intimate and informative and ultimately help myself and the other vendors gain some business with Brides who we may not have been able to meet with otherwise. I planned this thing in January and held it in April. It was nuts- literally I was selling ad space, selling listings, getting myself on TV, promoting it in social media and blog posts. I don't know how I did it. I 'hired' my friend Cassie to help me with some of the duties, but she did it as a volunteer- which was SO awesome. such a great friend- seriously, she saved my butt!
There were a lot of phases to this event, a lot of layers and arms that could be used as a 'revenue source' and I just went with it, as crazy as it made me in the short amount of time to plan it.
So it turned out great! I couldn't have asked for better vendors, and the location was Red Butte Gardens and Arboretum too- wow, I had a great attendance and great follow up as well. I was even able to get The Knot to sponsor it in the form of swag, and that was awesome. I will keep that secret under my belt, and I am glad I have built upon that relationship with them. And it's my right to keep it a secret, I worked really hard to find the right contact, I worked hard all around on this. So it kinda bugs me when people just ask me for a contact. you have no idea sometimes how much time and effort went into getting that- no one helped me with creating my initial contact lists with this event or just this business in general. In fact, all of this was all me- i found a way and i did it. But anyways, im not here to vent, haha.
For this year, I planned it the beginning of the year instead of Spring. And this year I decided to sell my tickets through groupon. And I decided not to push ad sales in the workbook as hard, I didn't even do a workbook this year. I went with this next one as though I had built enough steam from my last one that 'surely people know about it, it will sell it self'
Long story short- the event flopped. like seriously flopped! I'm sure some people are laughing at me right now cause they love to see a person fail, and I am sure some people are surprised. I think most people are surprised, and that the 1% who really want to see me fail don't even bother to read my posts anyways.
The four vendors that showed up to present were great and were prepared of course, but out of 30 seats, 11 paid tickets (11 and then their plus one) 3 people showed up you guys. 3. one wasn't even getting married, one was an actual bride and her plus one was her mother.
But we made the best of it and sat around 1 table and did a discussion. and then I was out $180 on food and supplies. So I am sorta glad , now, that I didn't spend $800 like I did for the first one. But it goes to show, you need to spend money to make money. I probably shouldn't have been to cocky, and made so many different changes to my approach. But then again, you have to try or you won't know.
And even the day after, I sent a very honest email to all the vendors, even my sponsor, the knot. and I told them why I think it failed, I apologized and made a promise to give them some business either way the best I could. and I got great feedback from all of them. Of course there was disappointment, but when you work with great people , we all just want to see each other succeed and be happy and that was the overall sentiment.
I wasn't going to let this flopped workshop bring me down. I knew there was a way to engage new brides, help them, and help them help me. I am working on a big tech/media project and I was able to do surveys and get participation from actual Brides, in Utah. and they got a Knot swag bag by participating. It was a win win for all of us cause I needed market research done and I had stuff to give away and people wanted that stuff. I mean.. it was almost too easy.
I want people to understand that planning a public event is not easy, its intimidating, it's not always the same time and time again, and you have that fear of 'what if people don't show up' My first one went well, and my second one didn't. And maybe it was luck or maybe it was meant to be a learning experience from the beginning. I can go crazy with all the 'what if's'- but I didn't and I don't now. I accepted it and made myself find a solution to fulfill the goal of my event which was to connect with local brides (the big picture here is to obviously try to gain business out of them) and make my sponsor happy- And I did it.
If anyone is struggling out there with a situation that 'seemed' to fail on them. don't let it get to you. take a step forward and look at the overall goal and find another solution to that goal . It is never a one way path or an easy one for that matter. Pat yourself for taking the leap to make something happen, don't put yourself down for any reason, and be honest with people that are involved. When you take yourself into a business adventure- whether it's a hobby that pays, or a simple handmade item you want to sell, or something really big like an accounting service or a full time photographer- you are a business person. you have a business. and that business lives inside you because you had an idea backed up by your own confidence. Don't let that original spark leave you as you continue to grow in your journey of entrepreneurship. And don't be afraid to take it and use it on other business ideas or projects. It's that feeling that will , and should, get you through the 'flopped times' the downfalls and stumbles. Persevere!
I hope this helps, and I hope it helps you better understand me as well. When you see me hopping all over on different things, its cause I know, even if I fail at least I tried, and I had the guts to try, because I had an idea backed up by confidence. P.S. if you are wondering- I made no profit on any of the workshops. and will I still try to do them in the future..probably. and if you're asking why, then you didn't get this post.
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