The past month was about as stressful as I've been in a while. At some point the overwhelming pressure came on me to start looking for a new place to live. Interest rates are starting to creep up and home prices don't seem to be at a fair market value..super inflated to an exaggerated story of a recovery of the recession. People- unemployment is still staggeringly high, investors are gobbling up homes and the banks have slowed their releases on shortsales and foreclosures- Bernanke just raised the interest rates two weeks ago. Its not a recovery. It's people messing with our heads, and make people like me- rush into home buying.
Anyway, imagine if you will- Hormones and House Hunting. Just think about this, how do you feel? Yah! multiply that feeling by 10 and that was me. That was me to the point that my gums were bleeding, and my fertile window meant nothing cause I couldn't 'get into it'.
Finally, we've slowed down the hunting process, a new realtor has helped calm us down. Not one who was looking for the commission as fast as she could, let alone not telling us a very important bit of info about a house not accepting an FHA Loan- after we put in an offer. It was disappointing, to say the least.
Mission: Baby Miller Update
I was convincing myself that IUI was the way to go next month. A year and half of trying including 5 months of hormones and nothing...so heartbreaking. I had a moment of break down when all I could see was women all around me getting pregnant and giving birth and I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel, I thought it was time for an aggressive approach. I was prepared for the bill, on top of the other bills that were piling up for our treatments.
I was mentally prepared to take the femara, then the shot of hcg and then the meeting of an a egg and sperm through IUI and hope for the best. I was even joking about it that it would be like a match.com in my uterus.
While stewing on this decision, I found a passion, one that I knew I already had, but little did I know how much it helped me get through my emotions. Baking. Like crazy. I thought wedding planning was where I was headed, but nope..it all lead me to baking. My old roommate, Brooke, and I had the same aspirations of a baking blog- so we did it. and now we have a facebook page and its probably the funnest thing I have done for myself in a long time. With the baking blog and my busy baking Sunday's it occured to me that I hadn't picked up my next fill of Femara. I usually pick it up the first day of my period.
Wes and I decided to give my body a little break, to take a little vacation from the hormones and allow me to just focus on what I am loving right now- Baking. So we are taking 3 months off of actively trying to make a baby. I tell you what- I am pretty happy about this. Although- I feel like there is some residual side effects in me, but nothing like the crazy stuff I had.
We are also still looking for a new home, but it's also taken more of a passenger seat. At some point I realized that the house will find us.
Anyway- there we are..here are some pictures of our Fourth of July. My Mother in Law is amazing!
Her famous flag cake and ribs!
It was a good day to have a cheat day! I loved being around the family.
2 comments:
great post! but so sorry you are having problems. I can't imagine going through the hormonal ups and downs you have been dealing with. taking a rest is a great idea..... come visit if you ever get back down in this 114 degrees of hell area.
Maggie! :) My friend is having a baby the end of this month so I think I will be there Mid August and we can meet up!
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